Day one of treatment:

Today is My’isha’s first day of chemotherapy. I have been waiting for this day some I received that call. The call when the doctor said there was a mass in My’isha’s belly and it may be cancer. These past few weeks have been a roller coaster of emotions. Today, I woke up unrested and extremely anxious, butterflies, panicky, shaky, the whole 9… I was told yesterday my beautiful baby girl has high risk stage 4 Neuroblastoma. I wasn’t able to hold a regular conversation the rest of the evening. No matter how well Dr. Meyer prepared us, no matter how much research I did, I wasn’t ready for today. Just like I was expecting, stage 4, but after he said it, and explained the treatment plan, I wasn’t ready for the flood of emotions that rose so quickly I almost dint have enough time to get out the room before tears filmed my eyes. This morning I needed to reach out. I needed to know what to expect from a mother’s perspective. I couldn’t call me mom or dad as I normally do for support. No, that’s not he support I needed this morning. I needed the support of another mom whose baby has been through this. I text a mom from 10-Strong. 10-Strong is a group of moms who have formed a bond on this 10th floor of OU Children’s oncology floor. She told me she would come visit with me today and she did. She was one of the best things that happened to me today. She validated the emotions and thoughts I have had over the past few weeks. She helped me feel normal again. I keep getting reminded through other moms and resources that I’m not the only mom going through all of this and I’m definitely not the first. Other moms before me have set up the programs and groups I need so I can focus on getting My’isha better. I have to be strong for her. I have to get used to the cancer lifestyle for a while. It is our strength that is going to get My’isha better…

March 27th, 2013 on the 10th floor of OU Children’s Hospital

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